She Will be Loved
by anneryn7
Summary: AU. He promised me that he'd stop taking drugs. I believed him and I shouldn't have. I feel like an idiot. He broke up with me and I feel relieved. Our relationship was toxic, I just couldn't see it. Owen stopped to make sure that I was okay, and turned into something more. Slight Eclare, Clowen endgame


**I DO NOT OWN DEGRASSI: THE NEXT GENERATION OR THE CHARACTERS.  
Music Credit: "She Will Be Loved" – Maroon 5**

* * *

_~*.*~  
_'_I don't mind spending every day, out on the corner in the pouring rain.  
Look for the girl with a broken smile.  
Ask her if she wants to stay a while.  
And she will be loved – she will be loved…'  
~*.*~_

* * *

I can't believe Eli actually streaked through school. He promised me that he'd stop taking drugs. I believed him and I shouldn't have. I feel like an idiot. I knew that he was having trouble dealing with finding Cam's body, but I don't know how to deal with this.

He hasn't always been this manic, even with his episodes. It's like something just snapped inside of him. I don't know how to help him and I don't think I can. I can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped.

And Jake is just making things worse. He's the one that gave him the pot in the first place. Things have spiraled so much since then. It's just all a mess.

"Clare," Eli said, walking over to me. I looked over at him in surprise.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were suspended." I asked, confused.

"I came to get my things. I have to keep up with my assignments. Adam said he'd bring me my homework." He explained. Something's off and I can feel it. That's not all he came to tell me. "Blue Eyes," he whispered, stroking the side of my face.

"Eli what's going on with you? I have no idea to handle this. Drugs Eli? You said that you'd stop and you haven't. It's one thing after another and it keeps getting worse. I'm scared that you'll end up hurting yourself." I told him, quietly. He sighed and dropped his hand.

"It's my life, Clare. I have to deal with things on my terms."

"But you're not dealing with them, Eli. You're going to snap one of these days." I pressed. He cocked his jaw and I could tell he was getting irritated.

"Yeah, well, maybe I'm not the problem. Did that ever occur to you, Clare? Maybe you're the problem. You keep pushing me to talk about things. I don't _**want**_ to talk about them. I keep picturing his body hanging there. I barely sleep. Drugs help me get out of my head for awhile. Why is that so hard to understand?" He barked at me. I flinched and took a step back.

"Do you even hear yourself?" I asked him.

"I can't do this anymore, Clare. This is too much. _**You're**_ too much. We're done. We never should have gotten back together in the first place. I'm better off without you." His words echoed in my ears and went straight to my heart. I was heartbroken, but only for a minute. Then, I started to feel relieved. He's no longer my problem. I don't have to worry about what he'll do next and I don't have to kill myself trying to save him.

"Good." I told him, keeping my voice even.

"Wh-what?" He asked me.

"Good, Eli. I can't do this, either. I feel like I don't even know you anymore. I spend all of my time worrying about you and what you'll do next. It's exhausting. When we got back together, I thought it was a good thing. I thought that we were getting a second chance, but now I know it was a mistake. If you keep repeating the same behavior, you get the same results. We don't work together. We never did. I need someone that will be there for me and that I can be myself with. I didn't sign up to be anyone's mother. That's what I feel like, Eli. It feels like I'm your parent, because you keep acting like a damn child." I snapped at him. He stared at me, blankly. "So, it's good. I'm glad that you broke things off when you did. If you hadn't, I'm sure that I would have soon. It'll be better for both of us." I finished, feeling proud of myself for standing up for myself.

"You're serious." He finally said, quietly.

"Yes, Elijah, I am."

"I didn't think you'd react this way."

"That's really not my problem." I told him, putting my things in my bag and shutting my locker.

"You seriously don't want me anymore?" He asked me. I shook my head.

"No, I don't." I answered.

"Wow, Edwards." He said, in disbelief.

"You broke up with me. Get over yourself." I told him, evenly, looking him in the eye.

"You ready to go Clare?" Jake asked from behind me. I looked over at him and nodded. "Do you still need a ride, Eli?" Jake asked my now ex-boyfriend. Eli didn't answer him, just looked at me. He always wants what he can't have. "Oookay, what did I just want into the middle of?" Jake asked us.

"We broke up." I told Jake.

"Seriously?" Jake asked.

"Yeah," Eli spoke up. Jake looked at Eli and then to me.

"Well, this is awkward." Jake mused.

"She can't handle being with a druggie." Eli sneered. I crossed my arms.

"You're the one who broke up with me." I reminded him.

"You were never this uptight when we were together." Jake said.

"You're siding with him?" I asked Jake in disbelief. Jake shrugged.

"Bro code," Jake answered. I glared at him.

"I'm your sister." I complained.

"Step-sister," Jake corrected me. I huffed. "You wanna ride man?" Jake asked Eli, again. Eli nodded.

"Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks." Eli accepted his offer. Jake just shrugged and started walking to the front of the school. Eli followed behind him. They didn't stop when I wasn't behind them, but I think that was the idea. I guess I'll walk home today.

* * *

I was almost halfway home, when I realized that all my newspaper things were still in my locker. Nothing I going right today! Fuck my life. I sighed and turned around, starting my trek back to school.

The walk itself didn't take me long. It was more of the fact that I had to walk back to school, on top of everything else. I'm so done. I have zero patience left. With my luck, Eli is going to be at the house with Jake, stoned out of his mind. I'll have to lock myself in my room and do my schoolwork, just to stay sane.

When I opened my locker door, I felt my resolve begin to slip. I saw all of the pictures of me and Eli. I hiccupped and felt the familiar burning in my nose and eyes. Tears started to leak down my cheeks. I tore all of the pictures of us out of my locker and threw them on the floor. I put my article in my bag and sank to the floor, crying.

No one else is here, at least I'm alone. I put my hand to my face and let it all out. I knew it was coming, I could feel it. But, none of that makes things any easier. I shoved a hand into my purse, trying to find a tissue, blindly. Finally, I found what I was looking for. I mopped off my face and blew my nose. I took a shaky breath and tried to compose myself, with no luck.

After what felt like hours, I wiped my face with the sleeve of my cardigan. I think I've cried myself out. I hiccupped and tried to catch my breath. I'm exhausted.

I jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned and saw Owen crouching next to me. I sat up straighter and I scrubbed my face with my sleeve, before looking back over at him.

"Clare, are you okay?" He asked me, softly. Concern covered his face. I forced myself to nod. I've seen Owen before, but I've never really stopped at looked at him. He's gorgeous, especially his deep blue eyes. "You don't look okay." He pressed. I shot him a look. He held up his hands in surrender. "No offense." He added.

"It's been a long, shitty day." I sighed. His eyebrows rose in surprise.

"It must be, because I never thought I'd hear Saint Clare cuss." He voiced. "What's wrong?" He asked me.

"Why do you care?" I quipped. He looked taken aback, but just smirked.

"Trouble in paradise?" He guessed.

"We broke up."

"I always thought you guys were a weird couple, anyways." He shrugged.

"You've never even said two words to me. We've been going to school together for years. Why are you talking to me, now?" I asked him, looking up at him expectantly.

"You were crying. I wanted to make sure you okay. Sue me." He retorted, before sitting down next to me.

"What are you doing?"

"Sitting down," he answered. "Are you always this defensive?"

"Sometimes," I admitted. "I prefer narcotic." I joked. We both laughed at that.

"So, what happened with you and emo boy?" He asked me. I sighed.

"He decided that drugs should be his only priority. He said that everything was my fault and he couldn't be in a relationship with me anymore." I recapped for him. Owen nodded.

"What a dick." He remarked. I nodded. "He just ended things, just like that?" He asked. I nodded, again.

"I told him that I thought ending things would be good for both of us. I couldn't do it anymore. It was so draining. I felt like his mother. That's not what it's supposed to be like." I sighed.

"So… why were you crying?" He asked.

"He was a big part of my life for a long time. It's hard letting that go. I know that it's not enough reason to stay with him… I guess I was trying to get over that. I wish I would have seen that sooner."

"Hey, don't beat yourself up over it. Life is too short." Owen told me, as he put an arm around my shoulders. I looked over at him, questioningly. He gave me a little shrug. "I'm being comforting. Just go with it." He advised. I laughed. "You have a nice laugh." He mused. I fought a blush.

"Thank you."

"I'm just stating the obvious."

"No, I mean, for this. You didn't have to stop and listen to my sob story, but you did and I appreciate it." I told him, leaning into his embrace.

"It's not like not like I had anything better do to." He brushed off my gratitude. "Let's go." He suggested.

"Go where?" I asked him.

"It's Friday and I'm not letting you spend yours moping around over some douche that doesn't deserve it." He told me, as he got up. Once he was standing, he reached out and helped me to my feet. I realized just how tall he was, especially compared to me.

"I'm sure you have other plans." I protested. He shook his head, still holding onto my hand.

"I'm pretty sure I just told you that I didn't."

"Why do you want to spend Friday night with me?" I asked him, unable to stop myself. I know I'm reading too much into this, but I can't help it. It's the way that I'm wired.

"Clare, I'm a guy and you're attractive. You do the math." He responded. I giggled. "You no longer have a boyfriend. I want to take you out. It's not that complicated."

"I'm a mess." I argued, gesturing to my face and sweater. He laughed.

"Guys don't really care about that stuff. You look beautiful, even without your makeup on." He assured me. For the first time today, I was stunned into silence.

* * *

"This is nice." I told Owen, as we walked through the park, holding hands. He smiled at me. "It's uncomplicated."

"That's a good thing." He agreed. "Honestly, I didn't think you'd agree to come out with me." He admitted.

"Why not?"

"I don't know. We're just different, not that it's bad. I guess I didn't know what to expect."

"I see what you mean."

"Do you regret it?" He asked me, slowing to a stop.

"Coming out with you?"

"Yes."

"No, I don't regret it. I'm actually really glad that I did. You've made my day so much better."

"Good, because I'm going to kiss you."

"You're going to kiss me?" I echoed. He nodded and cupped the side of my face. I forgot how to breathe. He leaned down and moved closer. I felt his breath dance across my face. I grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him closer to me. His lips touched mine and I whimpered.

The kiss was innocent and chaste. I pulled away and looked at him. My heart was pounding on overdrive. I can't think about anything other than the feeling of his lips on mine. I want more. I want him.

I stood on my tiptoes and wrapped my arms around his neck and fused my lips to his. He accepted the kiss, gratefully. I moved my mouth against him and he ran his tongue along my bottom lip. I parted my lips for him, welcoming his tongue.

Our tongues moved together in a dance for dominance. I kept my lips firmly against his. He didn't seem to mind. I pulled away for air and he started nuzzling my neck. I let out a low, wanting moan. He lifted me off of my feet and I wrapped my legs around him, grateful that I wore jeans. He backed me up against a nearby tree and resumed attacking my mouth, with renewed fervor.

He ground his hips against mine and I felt his arousal. I gasped against his lips. He pulled away and looked at me with hooded eyes. He rolled his hips again and I moaned. I held onto him tighter, but made no move to stop him. He kept grinding against me and I felt myself becoming wet.

He moved his mouth to my neck and started leaving a trail of wet kisses. I whimpered and bucked my hips against his. When I couldn't take anymore teasing, I pulled on his hair. He pulled away and stilled his movements.

"Too fast?" He guessed. I nodded.

"I've never gone further than this… not really." I admitted. He looked at me, surprised.

"You and Eli never…?"

"I'm a virgin."

"And he's never copped a feel?"

"I didn't say that." I said, defensively. He set me on my feet, but kept me pressed against the tree. "I just haven't done… a lot."

"I can be patient." He told me, solemnly. I snorted. "I can. You obviously don't know me very well."

"If you say so."

"I wouldn't pressure a girl into something she wasn't ready for."

"What about Alli?" I quipped, remembering what happened on Vegas Night.

"That's different. I was a different guy back then. I've grown up a lot since then, Clare. It's been a while since I've slept with anyone. I'm okay if I have to wait longer."

"You're so sure that I'll have sex with you eventually?" I guessed.

"I never said that. We're not even together." He corrected me. I sighed.

"I didn't mean to take your head off. I'm sorry." I apologized, quietly.

"Don't worry about it. You've had a long day and I got you worked up."

"You didn't pick a fight."

"That's not what I meant." He said, rolling his hips against me to help explain.

"Oh," I replied, as it dawned on me.

"I'd offer to help you with that, but I don't want to push you, or this." He told me, as he pressed a soft kiss on my mouth.

"Would you want to be together?" I asked him. He leaned his forehead against mine.

"You're gorgeous, Clare. We barely know each other. We have chemistry."

"I know. I like how I feel when I'm with you, Owen. I'm willing to give this a chance. I'd like to get to know you better." I confessed.

"Would I just be a rebound?" He asked me. I shook my head.

"The things that I've felt tonight… I never felt that with Eli. We had spark, but it didn't feel like this. Us, we feel electric."

"You're saying that you want to be my girlfriend." He repeated, slowly.

"What do you want?"

"I want you, Clare. I want to be your boyfriend." He agreed, smiling lazily.

"I should probably get home." I sighed.

"I'll drive you." He offered. I nodded.

"I hope Eli isn't there."

"Why would he be?"

"He likes to get high with Jake."

"I can always stick around, if you want." He suggested.

"Well… my parents are out of town…" I told him, grinning.

"It's settled then. I'd like to see him try and talk down to you while I'm there. I'd kick his ass."

* * *

"Dude! Last time we skated through your house, Helen's head almost exploded." Eli complained as we walked through my front door.

"Dude, relax. She's not even home." Jake laughed.

"True…" Eli agreed, whizzing past us and into the living room. "Your sister's home." He announced. Jake looked over at us and laughed, taking a dreg of his joint.

"Hiya sis," Jake greeted me. Eli looked over at us and frowned.

"What are _**you**_ doing here, Milligan?" Eli asked Owen. I felt Owen tense up next to me.

"I was invited." Owen retorted.

"Are you really that desperate, Edwards?" Eli sneered. Jake doubled over, laughing. Every time he's high, he thinks that everything's hilarious. It's not.

"I don't have to be desperate to date someone other than you, Elijah." I told him, curtly. Eli fumed and walked over to us.

"You're seriously dating this Neanderthal?!" He yelled.

"Yes, not that it's any of your damn business." I seethed. Eli took a step towards me, but Owen stepped in front of me, blocking him from getting any closer.

"Back off, Goldsworthy. She doesn't want you._** You**_ broke up with _**her**_. I'm not going to just stand here and listen to you talk to her that way. Clare doesn't deserve it. She deserves a lot better than you." Owen growled.

"And you think that you're better?" Eli quipped.

"I'd never treat her the way you have." Owen answered. My heart fluttered and I knew that Owen was already better for me than Eli was. Our relationship was so toxic. With Owen, things are so exhilarating. I love it.

"Hey man, just leave 'em alone." Jake told Eli, as he came skating up to us. "I don't want to have to break up a fight. My dad and Helen _**would**_ kill me for that."

"You just expect me to let him say that to me and watch them flaunt their… whatever they have… around me?!" He asked, irritated. Jake shrugged.

"She's my sister, man. She lives here and you don't. You figure that out. Deal with it or go. She's not always my favorite person, either, but Owen's right." Jake leveled with Eli, staying surprisingly serious.

"Fine," Eli surrendered.

"We're going to my room." I announced, speaking up. I tugged on Owen's hand and he moved off to the side. Eli and Jake didn't say anything else after that, not that we stuck around to hear it. Owen followed me upstairs, quietly. "Sorry." I apologized to Owen as soon as I closed my bedroom door and locked it.

"You didn't make your ex act like an ass." Owen told me, coming up behind me and settling his hands on my waist. I turned to face him.

"Thank you." I breathed.

"For?"

"Defending me." I answered. He smirked.

"You don't have to thank me for that, Clare." He assured me, as he brushed a curl out of my face.

"Maybe I wanted to," I whispered, suddenly aware of how close we were.

"I can think of much better ways that you can thank me." He told me, softly.

"Oh?"

"Oh, yeah."

* * *

We made out and groped each other over our clothes. Owen ended up staying the night. The guys didn't bother us. I fell asleep in his arms. I watched him as he slept. He looks so gentle like this.

Yesterday morning, I never would have thought about the possibility of Owen resembling anything closer to gentle. He surprised me and I'm so glad that he did. Last night was wonderful. We're so wrong that it feels right. He's been nothing but a gentleman since school, yesterday afternoon. I feel safe with him. He puts me at ease so easily.

"Staring at people while they sleep isn't creepy at all." Owen mused. I jumped.

"I didn't realize that you were awake." I admitted, softly. He chuckled.

"You're so cute when you're jumpy."

"I'm not cute."

"You're right." He agreed. I scoffed. "You're beautiful." He supplied. I smiled and hit his arm, playfully. "What are you thinking about?" He asked me.

"Just… that I'm glad that this happened yesterday."

"You're not the only one." He smiled.

"Did you mean what you said?" I asked him.

"When?"

"When you told Eli that I deserved better?"

"Of course I did."

"Why?"

"Because it's true, Clare. You deserve so much better. I can give you better." He breathed, edging closer to me.

"Is that a promise?"

"Will you let me?" He asked, as he switched our positions. He was on top of me and I was forgetting how to breathe. He smells too good. "Let me show you just how good I can be to you." He said, as he brushed his nose against mine. It feels so intimate. I reached up and tangled my hand in the back of his hair. He ran his hand up my leg and let it rest on my thigh. "What do you say, Clare?"

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Show me."

"With pleasure."

* * *

_~*.*~  
_'_Yeah, tap on my window; knock on my door.  
I want to make you feel beautiful._

_I don't mind spending every day, out on the corner in the pouring rain.  
Look for the girl with a broken smile.  
Ask her if she wants to stay a while.  
And she will be loved – she will be loved…'  
~*.*~_

* * *

**A/N: I have Clowen fever, so expect more one shots to come! Reviews are love!  
-Anneryn**


End file.
